Six black cocks and a little white kitten…

On boys night, when we play cards and drink far too much, we tend to have the timeless classic ‘Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels‘ on in the background.

A subject of much debate has been what are the endings to jokes they are telling each other in the car journey, that due to the editing, you never get to hear the punchline, well a bit of Googling I found a (possibly not real) answer to one of them (warning! – a little bit rude):

TOM: There’s six black cocks and a little white kitten sitting on the side of the road. How many beaks have they got between them?

SOAP: Six.

TOM: How many wings have they got between them?

SOAP: Twelve.

TOM: How many feet?

SOAP: Er, well, twelve.

TOM: That’s right. So how many whiskers has the little white kitten got?

SOAP: How the fuck should I know?

TOM: How come you know so much about black cocks and so little about white pussy?

If anyone knows the end of the following one, let me know!:

‘All right, there’s this brass standing on the corner.’
‘Dwarf walks up to her carrying a suitcase…’